One of the many things I did not really take seriously when becoming a parent is that there’s a lot of things you can’t do for a kid. There’s problems that will make them unhappy, and you be there to coach them through it.
That can be good for their independence. It can also be bad if it’s a challenge not “scaled” to their level that convinces them they can’t deal with some things.
Either way, you will feel bad when they feel bad, and there’s not much you can do about it. There’s an unlinking between the levers you have and the reward or punishment you get.